Myths and Transgender 101 - Because Understanding and Acceptance Can Be Delayed By Ignorance

• Lifestyle choices like this make me feel uncomfortable
  No one chooses to be transgender. All people are born with an innate sense of self. So little of the human brain is understood. Where does the imprint that is "you" come from? If you can't answer that, then why would you try to tell someone they are not what they say they are? Saying that you identify as a goat is not a witty retort to someone that is declaring their gender identity. Why would you insist anyone would choose something that certain members of society demonize? I would not wish this scenario on anyone and I have not "chosen" it for myself. I simply have a strong and healthy view of who I truly am. Now THAT is something I wish everyone had.
• So you are transgender, it is great that you are so open about your sexual orientation!
  Wait.. what! This is a slight edit to an actual message I received. Being transgender and being out as transgender IN NO WAY says anything about my sexual orientation. The statement above implies that a transgender woman transitions simply to be able to have sex with men. This is not true! Sexual orientation is separate from gender. Repeat that in your head until you finally get it.
• Isn't being transgender, a transvestite, or a cross-dresser really all the same thing?
  No, these terms are not synonyms. A transgender individual has a gender identity that is different than the determination of their sex at birth. A transgender individual's clothing and outward expression begins to match their gender identity as they grow to accept themselves or as they are able to transition.
• People that are transgender just want attention
  Most transgender people purposely try to stay out of the public eye because of the stigma that society has placed on us through ignorance. Those that choose to be visible do so in order to try to take on both ignorance and harmful stereotypes. Of course, we also want people to stop attacking us verbally and physically (sometimes murdering us) simply because they fear what they do not understand. Calling attention to this violence is necessary!
• I have never met a transgender person
  Actually you probably have. We come from all walks of life and once a transgender person transitions you may or may not 'be able to tell.' The population numbers for transgender people often repeated in the media are likely vastly underestimated. There is no accurate census data for us. We are just people going about our daily lives just like you.
• If you don't get or want surgery, then you are not really transgender, right?
  Wrong! While many transgender people have surgery or plan to have surgery (as they try to financially plan for it), others are able to find balance and relief from dysphoria through accepting themselves and altering their gender expression. Others go through hormone replacement therapy and that ends their battle with dysphoria. There is no one perfect path that is followed by "real" transgender people.